The quiet mouse

My girls like pokemon. Especially the different evolutions of Pikachu.

These stuffed animals have gone everywhere in the past few months. Most of the time the stuffed animals get beat up pretty good.

Today my daughter brought me this stuffed animal. She wanted me to sew it up with yellow thread. I didn’t have a yellow that matched so I choose white. She also suggested orange blue and red.

I still kept the white thread. I am using a self threading needle. I really need new glasses too so the needle is really easy for me to use.

I haven’t handled sewn in ages. It’s kinda nice to sit and see a bit. I really want to get my sewing machine out too.

I’ve been listening to hymns in the evening before I go to bed. If I remember.

Ive been on an amazing journey with God lately. I quit my job a month ago and have found something amazing to replace it.

I kicked butt on applying for jobs. I applied to over 70 places. I had 6 or 7 interviews.

Me getting this job is all God’s doing. I give him all the credit for it.

I know he was the one that let me feel completely at peace about leaving my previous job. There is no other way to explain it.

I know if I start going back to church and taking my girls I will definitely get some heat from my husband for it and his family. His idea is that there’s other things we can be doing while was at church.

I need to start breaking these icy cold walls that are around me that he built. I have to break out of the isolation and get back to where I need to be.

I lost friends when I married my husband. Those friends saw red flags that I didn’t see and tried to warn me. They walked away when I didn’t listen to them.

I hope and pray that God helps me through this next journey.

I’m seriously considering divorcing him and being a single mom.

I really need a good strong Christian husband who isn’t going to abuse me mentally, physically and emotionally.

I want hugs. I want encouragement. I want a mother in law who cheers me on instead of tearing me down for how I parent.

I know God is laying the groundwork for something amazing. I just don’t know yet.

I want a husband who is willing to read the Bible with me. I want to do family devotions.

I don’t want to feel like I have to jump through hoops to get what I want and to find out the goal post has moved.

So please if you are reading this pray for me. If you have pieced the puzzle together and know who I am just hug me, text me some encouragement.

If you know who I am and want to be bold come hang out with me and my girls.

My husband is home on the weekends. I hate it. Everything I did during the week or didn’t get to gets picked over and I get criticism for.

This is the second time he’s mentioned that he’s not been taking his medicine correctly. He takes it different times now and sometimes forgets to take it at all. He then tells me about it and the withdrawal symptoms.

Im pretty sure he’s doing it on purpose. Like he’s trying to get me to walk on egg shells so I won’t make him mad.

Today I’m trying to get done what I can before he starts the criticism and not picking.

I wish he would be more like a partner in this instead of a boss.

That’s just what I deal with.

Today I was told by my mother in law that the reason one of my daughters has started to bite her sister is that they have no structure.

That I have created monster children by not putting them in pajamas every night and letting them fall asleep in the clothes they played in.

Sometimes this house is so chaotic that getting pajamas on them is a struggle.

I choose to pick and fight my battles.

I have a daughter that gets easily distracted and upset if you try to push her into things. Sometimes we have to do that to get going in the morning.

Kids biting each other is something that happen.

I really don’t appreciate getting put down as a mom. I told my husband what she said and he didn’t say anything or react to it.

This family really has issues.

I just got a good job. I cried tears of happiness and I get dragged down by the person I just cheered with.

How is that right?

I turned my life upside down and found something that would benefit my family.

The chaos and unknown was temporary and were back on track for structure within our family.

I don’t need to be dragged down for my choices to better my family.

I’d loved to be cheered at for doing something amazing for my family.

We’ll find a new normal. We figured it all out. Just because I was out of work for a month and I didn’t crack down on what we did to a T doesn’t mean my children will be monsters.

I’m sorry but I know the monster in the family and it is her.

Woot woot!

I had another 2 hour interview this morning with the GM of the store. I was only home for 10 minutes and they called me and offered me the job. I’m so happy.

The owner of the company i formally worked at told me that I would never find anything as good as it was there. Ummm well I think I found something better.

I was so nervous going to the interview. I cried after I accepted the job offer. Now I’m really nervous again.

New people and new things. Currently dealing with trying to keep my mind from going bonkers. I won’t start for another week yet.

I have to clear background and drug tests. I know for certain those will be fine.

Not my chicken. I don’t even have chickens. I don’t like live chickens. I screenshot this from Facebook this morning.

This chicken seems ready to battle the world. Ready to take on a villain.

Its how I feel when someone tells me I can’t do something I know I’m capable of.

This is the same look my cat gives me when I tell her it’s freezing out and she’ll be cold in the snow.

Its the look you feel when you know your music and know your field show and know that you’re band will be badass on the field.

The look you give people when they want to hold your babies and call them ” my babies”.

The look the cat gives you when you tell them that they are out of catnip.

The look your full sized dairy goat gives the cat she hates.

How you want to respond to your friend who takes months to answer a text.

How you feel when you find out a friend got married and didn’t tell anyone or invited anyone.

When your kid takes the handle off the toilet for the umteenth time.

When you step on a Lego and realize that you missed one.

That flash of anger that appears when you think about people who purposely hurt others.

Okay so I had 3 interviews today. One of those interviews called me back and wants to interview me tomorrow for a second time. This would be at a farm store at a parts counter. I would be working for a tractor company.
So please pray it goes well for me. Originally it was supposed to be a phone interview this morning. The phone call never happened and needed to be rescheduled.Well I called the parts manager after I got out of a different interview today and I ended up doing a walk in interview with them. Tomorrow I meet them and the general manager of the area. I wasn’t even home 20 minutes and they wanted to set up another interview. I’m very excited about it and really really nervous. The only reason this is happening like this is because God is doing it.
Please please pray for me.

The only reason today happened the way it did was God had his hands all over it. There’s no other way it would have worked out like it did.

Ill let you know how the interview goes tomorrow.

hopefully I get this job.

I had a phone interview today. I don’t think it went well. Some of the questions I wasn’t sure how to answer. I think my phone recorded the call so I’m going to go listen to it again and write down those questions and figure out proper answers to them.

I also called a few places and asked about my application status. Hopefully I’ll hear back from some of them by the end of the week. I just really need a job.

Not that I don’t want to work. I do. I’m just really enjoying being home with my girls.

Plus I would have money coming in for the house.

I would love to have a remote job with healthcare insurance. Trying to find a remote job is kinda hard. Some of them are billing and coding jobs that require a degree. Others are insurance and realtor jobs.

So have a backup plan.